Birthdays, Babies, and Life. Oh My!

Posted on February 3, 2011

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First order of business, just because I mention babies in the title it does not mean I am hinting at my pro-creative status.  In other words ‘I ain’t knocked up..a thankyouverymuch!’  I mention it because my husband finally had THE TALK, you know about where babies come from and how we stop them from coming from there.  Now our youngest is (nearly) 7 and I had always said I didn’t want my kids spaced beyond 3 years apart, so that is clue one that we had decided we were done.  We have also discussed in the past how much we enjoy our children being older now, and though we miss them being small, we love how independent they are, and how much more freedom we have when planning family outings.  Plus…the idea of diapers, and midnight feedings, and being spit up on is not all that appealing to me anymore.  So basically we have felt that out family is complete for a while now.  However we have never really discussed what methods we want to take to make our family size permanent until today. So within a year or so baby making will officially, and permanently be shut down.  I know it’s right for us, but I still feel a little sad.  I like babies, I like toddlers ( I know crazy right?) and I miss having one around and there are times I wish we would have had a third, but I really believe that window is closed now…I think when the idea of another baby became more about the  chore of it all, and not about the joy of it all that when I knew I wasn’t cut out to be the mother of three.

Another reason we made the decision to make things permanent is because I am getting older, and I am going to smoothly segue way into birthdays…oh look how did I get here.  So yeah, my birthday is in roughly 3 weeks.  I’ll be 34.  I am pretty “meh” about it and I don’t know why..it’s not because I dread it, I am just not really moved by it either way.  This means I am moving into my mid thirties, which is kind of cool, but it seems like it is all happening so fast.  I feel like I just turned 25 last year.  It was just yesterday that my kids were still itty bitty, and just learning how to walk and talk.  The days, and weeks just seem to go by quicker and quicker, and sometimes that makes me sad, because I feel like I am missing out on stuff.   Especially now as my kids are, and want to be more independent I am having to learn how to just stand back, and let them do things on their own, even if they fall I have to let them hit the ground because they need to learn how to pick themselves back up now.  When I was younger I thought the hardest part about getting older must be the wrinkles, gray hair, and my body, or mind giving out on me.  Now that I am close to the “middle”  for me it’s not the physical changes that are bothersome it’s the loss of time, because it all passes by in a blink.

Another thing that reminds me of the passage of time is my wedding anniversary coming up in a month.  It’ll be 10 years.  Ten years waking up next to the same person, laughing with him, being goof balls together, holding hands, holding our babies, and going to sleep next to him.  It’s not just 10 years of marriage its ten years of friendship, and love, and camaraderie and it feels like we just met a few weeks ago.  I guess I will say that cold wintry weather makes me wistful..yeah that’s it…the weather.

Speaking of the weather, it is butt cold here in Central and South Texas.  These poor people just don’t know what to do in this cold…and it’s actually cold not a Texans idea of cold, our temp this morning was 17F and the wind chill was I believe 9F?  All I know is I went outside to take some pictures, because I like the way a gray overcast day looks, and even though it was 20, the wind chill was still 9F.  So I was all like:

It’s flippin’ cold, and this is the only picture I got.

Some nice red berries.

I’ve been away from the weather in the north far to long to tolerate temperatures below 30.  I still love the cold weather though and wish it would stay longer.  It’s supposed to snow though today and/or tomorrow.  I am so excited….it feels like Christmas!  I am weird like that.

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